laurenfelton

projectqueer:

Elizabeth Hasselbeck: Lesbians Just Can’t Find A Man

Project Queer: Thanks for sharing this!

My favorite part of the article:

Hasselbeck told viewers that lesbians link up for companionship, not sex—a claim which her co-host, Joy Behar, called “ridiculous.” “Being gay is not just holding hands and walking through the tulips,” Behar says. “Oh Elisabeth,” quips Pop Crunch, “it takes real work to make Sarah Palin look like the smartest Republican with a vagina.”

That is such a ridiculous claim. I can only hope that Hasselbeck was kidding. (I do not watch TV at all really so I could not tell you what kind of personality Hasselbeck has). Either way, props to Joy Behar for telling it like it is.

I don’t watch The View, but I watch most of the clips about LGBTQ-related issues. I typically disagree with Hasselbeck, and this is no exception, but I must say I’m pretty put off by all the criticism she and other women on the show face. They certainly make a lot of ignorant comments about homosexuality (as do the majority of people I know), but those comments are always attributed to the fact that they’re idiotic women rather than the fact that they’re not particularly well-versed in queer theory.

I don’t like what Hasselbeck is saying, but I also don’t like the fact that no one can offer an intelligent critique of what she’s saying without making a quip about her vagina. The fact is: she’s not an expert on sexuality and neither is Joy Behar. I could write an entire essay here about why Behar’s view is just as problematic as Hasselbeck’s, but because she appears to be defending lesbians, a lot of gays are blindly defending her and dismissing Hasselbeck as stupid, as a dumb blonde, as another idiotic Republican with a vagina.

I think this clip is pretty important in that these women reflect the variety of misguided views out there on sexuality — both Hasselbeck’s idea that lesbianism is about a lack of options and Behar’s idea that shifting sexual attraction is all about societal pressure and embracing one’s ‘true’ sexuality later in life. Hasselbeck is dismissing lesbianism as a last resort, but Behar is dismissing all older, recently out lesbians as women who have been suppressed their whole lives, longing for another woman while suffering though unhappy heterosexual relationships. It is possible, you know, for people to have fulfilling relationships with the opposite sex and fulfilling relationships with the same sex.

A lot of the people I know are so resistant to the idea that this can happen because they’re frightened by the idea that sexuality is fluid. Perhaps they’re worried the “ex-gay” religious crowd will use these kinds of examples to validate the idea of gay conversion therapy, or perhaps they’ve got a bad taste in their mouth from years of hearing: “it’s just a phase; you’ll settle down with a nice [man/woman] eventually.” Whatever the case, it’s a dangerous mindset to trap ourselves into. You can’t fight ignorance with ignorance. Although I’m sure there are a lot of women out there who have finally embraced their lesbianism after years of unhappy heterosexual relationships, that’s not true for everyone, and attempting to invalidate a person’s past experiences and feelings by attributing their life choices to societal pressure does nothing to advance our community. There’s really no reason to keep shoving ourselves into boxes when it comes to defining our sexuality.

jumbleofnotes:

oldfilmsflicker:

theartsygay:lgbtlaughs:stainedbrightly:

Reblogged from fuckyeahlgbt; Via this Craigslist post:

A mutual friend of ours threw a big party for her 30th birthday, tons of people were there and it was a lot of fun. Somewhere along the line you and I ended up on the balcony for some fresh air at the same time. We started chatting; we talked about sports, books, tv – discovered we both are about to start our masters degrees and spent some time debating the pro’s and con’s of the educational system. We talked about hanging out sometime, and you wanted to meet my girlfriend.

I understand how upsetting it was for you when I blinked mildly in surprise and said I was here with my husband. I know it was a shock to your system, if your face had turned any paler I might have called 911. You made a good recovery though - that hurried mutter of “I’m not like that” was very polite and you only knocked over two drinks and one vase in your hurry to rush to anywhere other than near me. I can’t blame you – I forgot how delicate you straight boys are. So I wanted to give you a few helpful hints about where you went wrong last night.

1) As a general rule we don’t walk around with big signs around our neck proclaiming our sexuality. No scarlet letters, no scent of hellfire and brimstone… sorry about that.

2) We do not generally assume that everyone within 5 feet of us must also be homosexual – it was nice of you to immediately reassure me that you are hetero, but it was really unnecessary.

3) Homosexuality is not infectious. While I am sure you meant no disrespect with your hasty departure; in the future you can rest assured that taking a few extra seconds in your mad dash for safety will not result in you being turned gay. It will however keep you from destroying expensive vases and knocking over senior citizens.

4) This next one may come as a surprise; but you are not, in fact, irresistible. The fact that you have a dick does not instantly turn me into a bundle of uncontrolled lust. Contrary to popular opinion, being in the same room with a straight man does not cause a gay man to instantly lose all common sense and basic common courtesy. Though I am not so sure about the reverse.

5) Homosexuals in general get a little irked when people treat us like some sort of leper. Rushing to another mutual friend of ours and advising him of my sexuality, so he could be “forewarned” was really uncalled for.

6) Upon being told (by said mutual friend) to stop being an idiot and that you were not my type anyway… it generally confuses the issue when you then proceed to become upset that I DON’T find you attractive. Three seconds ago you were running through a crowd of people with your hands cupped protectively over your junk as if I might attack you at any moment with a blowjob. See hint number 4.

7) We homosexuals have an odd sense of humor – I can’t help that. Something about watching you freak out as if all the demons of hell were after you just struck me as vastly amusing.

8) While being pissed at me for dissolving into uncontrollable laughter might be understandable… gathering a couple guys together to “teach the fag a lesson” is not.

9) You might also want to drink a little less and be a little more careful about the guys you approach for your little proto-hate-mob.

10) Assuming the two tall muscle-bound bruisers must be uber-hetero and just as appalled by my presence as you was your first mistake. It was an understandable one though. How were you to know that pflag tshirt the first guy was wearing wasn’t a sports team? Also the rainbow ring the second guy was wearing could have meant anything I am sure.

11) In retrospect I suppose that upon hearing your not very subtle hate-talk and seeing who you were heading for; I could have said something instead of just laughing harder. I apologize for that. I should have just introduced you to my husband instead of letting you walk up to him and ask him if he wanted to help you teach “that fag over there” a lesson. I hope that broken nose heals up cleanly.

:O :D :)

BEST.

PERFECTION.